Will The World Ever Look the Same Again?

In the space of a few short months, my world, my future, my life have all been on the receiving end of a monumental shake up, albeit one that has been a long time coming, it was still a bit of a shock to the system when change really took hold and started shaking.

I feel like I'm looking at life through new eyes.  Maybe this is what people who "find" religion feel like.  It's finally feels like I know where I'm headed, like I know what my purpose is.

Throughout the day I find my mind wandering, what I need to do, what it will be like.  Thoughts wash over me at the strangest time, like this evening, walking around the mall when suddenly I thought to myself, "is this all going to "look" different when I come back? Am I going to see everything through new eyes?"

The confidence roller-coaster is currently plummeting faster than the Giant Drop at Dreamworld. I've sort of worked myself into a mild state of panic over the amount of people who will or more actually won't show at my Auction.  I have this recurring dream of just me, my daughters and two friends standing listening to my guest speaker... I know (hope) this won't be the case, but right now, it's a genuine fear...I'm not sure what more I can do to promote and sell tickets, I've contacted rowing clubs, climbing clubs, friends, ex-dolleagues all in the attempt to generate interest, I just keep repeating the mantra I live by "It's okay, I'll be fine..."